Chinese astrology says that once every sixty years the year of the horse aligns with the element of fire and the fire horses are born. Woman born under the fire horse sign are doomed, as this particular marking was thought to be ruinous. The truth is that many parents killed their fire horse daughters rather than see them set up to live a doomed life or allow them to wreck the family. Women born under the fire horse sign have been persecuted throughout history. I think part of the doom was that they were unmarriable, but also that they were rebellious and would bring about the destruction of their family.
I was a fire horse, a woman with a ruinous birth date. I loved having that marking. I embrace my cursed qualities of being hot, alive, wild, and free. I understood being the scapegoat, being abandoned, bearing the cross. I carried the baggage of my birth proud and strong, fiercely, with attitude. I dare you to get in my way, or even come near, bla bla bla.
Then I found out that the Chinese New Year starts on the 25th of January and I was born on the 7th. I am not a fire horse after all. Everything else about me was still the same and true, but I was no longer doomed because of my birth date. Oh.
Which reminds me of what a fortuneteller once told me as she read the lines on my hands at 28. “Oh, you have a rare line. I forget what that means... let me look it up. Oh yes, success after 40.” I could not bare it, could not tolerate the sentence, which oddly enough came true. But the really cool thing she said was that even the lines on your hand are not set in stone. If you change, use your hands differently than you always have, new lines will form, old lines will fade. In the end I am not a big believer in astrology or hand readings, it is all interesting, but none of it is running my life. The bigger idea here is that it is all changeable. Our histories are transformable, our stories are not the be all end all. It ain't where you're from, its where you're at. Everything is in our power to manifest. All transformation is possible. Happy travels, my friends.