Wednesday, March 18, 2015

"Sonny one so true, i love you.."


Around this time a year ago, I was in a lot of grief. We were supposed to adopt a baby in New York and right before the due date the couple changed their mind. God bless them. I hope they are doing great with their baby. At the time I was so devastated.

Adoption is great but it has some real difficult parts to it. One difficult feature is that you are not supposed to attach to a baby until the adoption is legally finalized because that baby may not be a keeper. It is pretty impossible not to attach to a baby that you are aching to love and raise and who may be going home with you, but the warning is fair. Blabbing about the baby to everyone and buying stuff for him (yes, it was a boy) and decorating a room etc, makes matters worse. So I get it, keep it a secret until it is a done deal and then get excited and tell everyone. The issue of not having a car seat or a bassinet at the birth can be worked out. Its not convenient, but not many things about babies are.

So we had played it cool but were still heart broken when the adoption fell through. I was lying under a tree about a year and 2 or 3 days ago, when a baby came to me and communicated that he was "trying really hard to get to me!" I was confused but I felt peace and my despair lifted and I was able to have an open heart. I was able to again hope for a child and believe that the right one was coming. You can read the original post here:

Anyway, a year ago, 2 days after a baby communicated to me that he was trying to get to me, my son was born. I did not know about his birth yet. It took 2 days before we got a call that indeed a baby had been born and we had been chosen to parent him. We got to the hospital by 1pm and left the hospital twelve hours later with our beautiful son. We called a friend and told them what we needed and they left some baby wipes and a bassinet outside their garage. We picked it up before driving to our home. It was pretty easy to get all of our needs met despite the lack of preparation. We walked on eggshells because we had to. Our friends said that they peeked out the window in the morning and smiled when they saw the stuff had been indeed needed and taken (Love you guys!).

And here we are. What a treasure. What a joy. What a fun year this has been. Happy birthday little son. If I can pass along anything to you,  dear reader, I would like you to know that it is within your reach to have your heart's desire. If I could do it, you can. I promise. Lucky, lucky me. I have gratitude from the bottom of my heart for this gift.

"Sunny, yesterday my life was filled with rain.
Sunny, you smiled at me and really eased the pain.
The dark days are gone, and the bright days are here
My sunny one shines so sincere, Sunny one so true, I love you."
This version is AMAZING!! worth checking out

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