Sunday, April 12, 2015

And later, in a downstairs room she pulls her lover down....


We all have a "type", something programmed into our brains, hardwired into our DNA, whatever, a type of guy that we just like, fall for, whatever.  My type was  epitomized by young Billy Idol. Don’t judge me, not solo Billy Idol with the firsts and the lip and all that crap. Way before that. Young Billy’s name was originally Billy Idle, the way punks picked names that showed how much they did not care, but I think it was printed wrong somewhere and then he kept the new version so as not to be tied to Eric Idle.

Once, my friend Tina, who was older and cooler than me, brought the newly released the Dancing with Myself single to a party at my house and it was so happening and current and cool. I feel in love with the song. But more striking was when I went on one of my first dates, I think I was a freshman in high school and the guy was older and had a car and took me at my request to see the film DOA at a theatre on the upper west side. I cannot remember what the theatre was but it was on the west side of the street somewhere around 70th street?

The film has a lot of problems but it also has a few of the most brilliant moments of music on film since Gimme Shelter. I will never ever forget the scene of Generation X doing Kiss Me Deadly. I was shaken to my core by the coolness of the song and devastated by how Billy Idol looked. It hurt to look at him. He was IT, painfully perfect in hair, face, dress, voice, mouth, hands, mannerisms...help me!! Is he tall? Well I gotta look up. What color are his eyes? I don’t know he’s always wearing shades. Well I hear he’s pretty bad. He’s good bad but he’s not evil.

If you looked up the word unavailable , his picture from that film would be in the dictionary. There was nothing hotter. And that is where all of my troubles began.

The funny part is that, after years of intentional work, I have exorcized my attraction to the unattainable gorgeous drug addict or whatever the f*ck right out of my system. I have not had interest in unrequited love in what feels like 100 years and is certainly over a decade. I remember the very day I put down that drug. Things are great. I have never looked back. And in fact looking back is often gross, sickening, so very unattractive, sad, boring, old. Yuck. Because now I truly love present people who are here, now, open, participating, alive, kind, gorgeous in a new better way.....but....

BUT! When I watch the Gen X footage from that DOA film, I can still feel in my body the ancient cellular chemical reaction. I can feel the ache of lust and desire of being a teenager as if it were happening right now. I am right there. 

They say that the things that left an imprint on your young brain from that special time of adolescence and early teens stay with you forever. I happily know better than to believe the hype of my teenage cells and brain but it is so fun to watch this amazing footage of amazing music from an incredible time. I am transported. Viva la Zeitgesit.  Viva la Teenagers! Viva la Vida!
“And later in a downstairs room she pulls her lover down.
In ecstasy but they can't make a sound
In case her mother might come down. Having FUN….” YES YES YES.

watch for yourself if you dare...(because it will fall flat like a lead balloon for some of you , but for others, uh-oh)


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