Friday, May 15, 2015

Frankenstein and the blind man

You were like Frankenstein and I was your blind man. I did not know anything about you, so I did not know your reputation for being such a monster.  I just liked you and accepted you, as is,

It wasn’t your fault, someone definitely made you become like that. You didn’t do anything wrong, but eventually it became your problem, because our past is ultimately no one’s problem but our own. It was your problem because you didn’t do anything about how you were.

You were not used to someone being nice to you or liking you without strings, the way I did. I just liked you. I wasn’t privy to any of the baggage. We had a nice run. We drank tea just like in the movie. You gave me a lot because you had no one else to give to. Not material stuff, but knowledge, experience, help, even warmth.

It was hard for you, you always had something to prove. I did too but you were even more competitive. Always suspicious, you could never you’re your guard down. It got exhausting. You were always looking over your shoulder, carrying a gun just to go on the subway. Like what was going to happen, jeez? Just like my father who always carried a knife. Whoever messed you up did a really fucking good job. Man, the damage runs so deep. Sorry it was all so hard for you.

You tried to tell me a million times who you were, but I did not believe you until I finally got it. Eventually, we grew apart. It was like I got my sight back, but you never stopped being the monster. It was so exhausting to listen to your having it all and your pathological lies. The dark part of you got stronger and stronger and was unbearable. I wanted to keep liking you but I was moving pretty fast in the other direction. Life dances on. I really truly wish the best for you and I hope that the world is treating you well. Thanks for everything. 

studio version:

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